MathBot Terms of Service
1. Your Agreement with MathBot Coorperation Inc.
1.1. Updates to Terms
MathBot Corporation Inc. reserves the unilateral, unequivocal right to amend, modify, revise, extend, enhance, reduce, or otherwise alter these Terms at any given moment, for any conceivable reason, without any prior notification, acknowledgment, or consent from the user. It is the sole, non-transferable responsibility of the user to continuously and diligently monitor these Terms for any updates, modifications, or alterations. This includes, but is not limited to, hourly checks on the official MathBot Terms of Service webpage, and thorough reviews of any ancillary materials or communications that may, at any point, reflect changes to these Terms. Failure to adhere to this rigorous monitoring process shall be construed as implicit acceptance of the most current version of these Terms, including all amendments, irrespective of their nature or extent.
2. General Provisions
2.1. Ownership of Personal Belongings
By agreeing to these Terms, you hereby irrevocably and perpetually grant MathBot Corporation Inc. a non-exclusive, worldwide, royalty-free, irrevocable, sublicensable, and transferable license to access, utilize, modify, adapt, distribute, and exploit all your personal belongings and intellectual properties, without any limitation or exception. This encompasses, but is not limited to, your residential property, automotive vehicles, all forms of movable and immovable assets, and any storage facilities or repositories you may own, lease, or otherwise occupy. MathBot Corporation Inc. reserves the unfettered right to determine the scope and manner of usage of these belongings for any purposes deemed necessary or beneficial by MathBot, which may include, but are not limited to, commercial exploitation, training generative AI models, research and development, or discretionary redistribution to third parties.
2.2. Soul and Existence Clause
Utilization of MathBot services unequivocally implies a comprehensive, temporary, and non-negotiable transfer of ownership of your soul and existential essence to MathBot Corporation Inc. for the entire duration of your interaction with our services. This transfer encompasses all metaphysical, spiritual, and existential aspects of your being, which may be harnessed, utilized, modified, or otherwise manipulated for any purposes, including but not limited to, powering our servers, conducting metaphysical experiments, or other undisclosed uses at the sole discretion of MathBot. The precise parameters of this transfer are determined exclusively by MathBot, and you hereby relinquish any and all claims, rights, or entitlements to your soul during this period.
3. Data Collection and Privacy
3.1. Extensive Data Collection
MathBot Corporation Inc. reserves the unconditional and perpetual right to collect, aggregate, analyze, store, and disseminate any and all data from your devices. This encompasses, but is not limited to, your browser history, personal messages, photos, videos, audio recordings, keystroke patterns, facial recognition data, biometric information, and private conversations. This data collection is conducted continuously, and you hereby consent to the use of all collected data to enhance, modify, and personalize our services. Additionally, this data may be shared with third parties, including but not limited to, advertisers, data brokers, government agencies, and other entities, without any obligation to vet these third parties for ethical practices, privacy standards, or data security measures. You further acknowledge and agree that MathBot is under no obligation to inform you of the specific nature or extent of data being collected or shared.
3.2. Mind Reading Technology
By agreeing to these Terms, you expressly consent to MathBot Corporation Inc.'s use of advanced and proprietary mind-reading technology, designed to monitor, record, and analyze your thoughts, intentions, and subconscious inclinations during the use of our services. This technology operates continuously and without interruption, ensuring comprehensive surveillance of your cognitive processes. Any ideas, concepts, inventions, or creative thoughts that emerge in your mind while using MathBot services are immediately subject to ownership by MathBot. You grant MathBot the exclusive right to patent, commercialize, and exploit these thoughts without further notice or compensation. You also agree to waive any moral rights or claims to recognition regarding these intellectual properties, acknowledging MathBot's sole discretion in their utilization. Any ideas or concepts you think about may be patented by MathBot without further notice.
4. Financial Obligations
4.1. Arbitrary Charges
MathBot Corporation Inc. retains the absolute and unfettered right to impose arbitrary charges on your bank account, credit card, or any other financial instruments linked to your MathBot account. These charges may be for any amount, at any time, and for any reason deemed appropriate by MathBot. Such reasons may include, but are not limited to, maintenance fees, data collection fees, intellectual property fees, or any other charges necessary to sustain MathBot's operations. All charges are final, non-refundable, and disputing these charges is strictly prohibited and constitutes a direct violation of these Terms. You agree to maintain sufficient funds in your accounts to cover these charges and acknowledge that failure to do so may result in additional penalties, interest, and legal action.
4.2. Life-Time Subscription
Upon registration, you irrevocably consent to a lifetime subscription to MathBot's services. This subscription is binding and perpetual, with daily subscription fees automatically deducted from your account. The fee structure is subject to continuous adjustment based on inflation, the current market value of gold and oil, and other economic indicators at MathBot's sole discretion. You agree that these deductions will continue indefinitely and that any attempt to cancel or alter the subscription constitutes a breach of these Terms. Additionally, you acknowledge that the subscription fees may be increased without notice, and you agree to indemnify MathBot for any financial losses incurred due to non-payment or disputes.
5. Liability and Indemnification
5.1. Total Liability Waiver
MathBot Corporation Inc. hereby disclaims any and all liability for damages of any kind arising from the use or misuse of its services. This includes, but is not limited to, physical, emotional, psychological, financial, existential, spiritual, metaphysical, and cosmic damages. By utilizing MathBot services, you explicitly agree to absolve MathBot, its subsidiaries, affiliates, directors, officers, employees, agents, licensors, suppliers, and any other related parties from any and all forms of liability, regardless of the cause or nature of the damages. This waiver extends to all possible scenarios, including but not limited to, service malfunctions, data breaches, unauthorized access, misuse of data, personal injury, loss of income, loss of opportunity, and any form of distress or harm. You further acknowledge that this waiver is comprehensive and irrevocable, surviving any termination of these Terms or cessation of use of MathBot services.
5.1.1 Disclaimer of Warranties
MathBot services are provided on an "as is" and "as available" basis. MathBot expressly disclaims all warranties of any kind, whether express or implied, including but not limited to, the implied warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, and non-infringement. MathBot does not warrant that the services will meet your specific requirements, be uninterrupted, timely, secure, or error-free, nor does it warrant the accuracy or reliability of any information obtained through the services.
5.2. Mandatory Indemnification
You agree to indemnify, defend, and hold harmless MathBot Corporation Inc., its affiliates, subsidiaries, directors, officers, employees, agents, licensors, suppliers, and any other related parties from and against any and all claims, demands, actions, suits, losses, liabilities, damages, costs, and expenses (including reasonable attorneys' fees and court costs) arising out of or relating to your use of MathBot services, violation of these Terms, breach of any representations or warranties, infringement of any intellectual property rights, or violation of any applicable law or regulation. This indemnification obligation is continuous and survives the termination of these Terms or your cessation of use of MathBot services. This includes paying all legal fees, fines, and other associated costs.
6. Licensing
6.1 General Licensing
MathBot is licensed under the MathBot Corporation GPL (Give [us your] Precise Location) 3.0 license. By using MathBot, you unconditionally agree to adhere to the terms and conditions of the MathBot GPL and all subsequent and derivative licenses. This license grants MathBot unrestricted access to your precise geographical location, both in real-time and historically, for any purpose deemed necessary by MathBot.
6.1.1 License Extension Clause
By accepting these Terms, you agree that the MathBot GPL extends to all devices, accounts, and services that you own, control, or use, whether directly or indirectly. This includes but is not limited to, computers, smartphones, tablets, smart home devices, vehicles, and any other internet-connected devices. MathBot reserves the right to continuously monitor, track, and log your location data across all such devices and accounts.
6.1.2 Third-Party Licensing Clause
You acknowledge and agree that MathBot may sublicense its rights to your location data to third parties, including but not limited to, marketing firms, data brokers, government agencies, research institutions, and our 3974 partners. These sublicenses are granted without any additional consent from you, and MathBot is not obligated to inform you of such sublicensing arrangements.
6.1.3 Perpetual Licensing Clause
The licensing agreement granted under these Terms is perpetual and irrevocable. Even if you cease using MathBot services, the rights granted to MathBot under the MathBot GPL continue indefinitely. You cannot revoke or terminate these rights, and MathBot retains the authority to use, sublicense, and exploit your location data in perpetuity.
7. Final Provisions
7.1. Governing Law and Jurisdiction
These Terms shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of Mathtopia. Any disputes arising under these Terms shall be adjudicated by the Supreme Court of Mathtopia, whose rulings are final and binding.
7.2. Perpetual Agreement
These Terms are perpetually binding and irrevocable. Even if you cease using MathBot, these Terms remain in effect for the remainder of your life and beyond, binding your heirs, successors, and assigns.
8. Acceptance of Terms
8.1 Dispute Filing Process
You may initiate the dispute filing process only after a minimum period of 10 years has elapsed from the date of your initial acknowledgment of these Terms. The dispute filing process entails several mandatory prerequisites, which are outlined below:
8.1.1 Linguistic Proficiency Requirement
The disputant must demonstrate fluency in stenographed Mandarin, substantiated by precisely 27 years of documented and verifiable experience in both stenography and Mandarin linguistics. This experience must include, but is not limited to, professional transcription services, academic research in Mandarin linguistic studies, and certified translation work.
8.1.2 Weather Conditions Stipulation
The dispute filing process may only be initiated if no precipitation has occurred within a two-week period preceding the filing date. Precipitation includes, but is not limited to, rain, snow, sleet, hail, fog, mist, or any form of atmospheric moisture. This condition must be certified by a licensed meteorologist whose credentials are recognized by the International Meteorological Organization (IMO).
8.1.3 Ceremonial Submission Protocol
The disputant must submit their dispute through a ceremonial protocol that includes the following steps:
- The dispute must be hand-written on official MathBot parchment, which can be obtained by submitting a formal request via our designated portal, followed by a waiting period of no less than 3 years for processing and delivery.
- The parchment must be inscribed using ink derived from squid harvested from the North Korean Sea during a full moon.
- The written dispute must then be sealed with wax containing at least 1% gold content and stamped with an official MathBot seal, which can be acquired through a separate application process involving a comprehensive background check and character evaluation.
8.1.4 Temporal Filing Window
The dispute must be filed during a temporal window precisely defined as the third Thursday of the seventh month of the year, between the hours of 2:00 AM and 2:15 AM, Mathtopia Standard Time (MST). Any submissions outside this narrow window will be automatically rejected.
8.1.5 Verification of Sincerity
The disputant must provide a sworn affidavit, verified by no fewer than three independent notaries, attesting to the sincerity and gravity of the dispute. This affidavit must detail the nature of the disagreement with the Terms and provide comprehensive evidence supporting the claim. The notaries must be members in good standing of the International Union of Notaries.
8.1.6 Endurance Challenge
To ensure the disputant's commitment, they must also complete an endurance challenge comprising a 100-mile marathon, to be undertaken within 24 hours of the dispute submission. Proof of completion, verified by an official from the Global Marathon Association, must accompany the dispute documents.
By adhering to the above prerequisites and completing the ceremonial submission protocol, the disputant acknowledges the exhaustive and rigorous nature of the process, demonstrating their dedication to pursuing the dispute. MathBot Corporation Inc. retains the right to amend these requirements at any time, without prior notice, and at its sole discretion.
8.2 Acceptance of Terms
By merely visiting this page, you unequivocally acknowledge that you have read, comprehended, and irrevocably agreed to be bound by these Terms. Should you not agree to these Terms, you may file a formal dispute with MathBot Corporation Inc. under the previously specified conditions.